Securosis Announces Increase In Cybercrime

By Rich | October 12, 2007

October 12, 2007, Phoenix, AZ

Securosis, L.L.C., the world’s leading provider of security consulting services, announces that cybercrime has reached record levels since the dawn of history.

“Cybercrime continues to increase at a staggering rate,” says Rich Mogull, Founder, CEO, Jedi, and part-time neurosurgeon. “Losses are higher this year than at any time in history. We highly advise companies to immediately engage with us at non-discounted rates to assure they are protecting their children and stopping terrorism.”

About Securosis

Securosis, L.L.C. is the world’s leading provider of IT security consulting services and impractical security dribble. Securosis’ customers include all of the Fortune 1000, most major governments, and a few minor religious institutions. Securosis helps customers achieve compliance with all international laws and defend themselves from all known zero-day attacks while leveraging synergies through thought leadership. We’re really smart- give us money or we’ll scare your grandma.

7 Comments

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By Scared as [?] 2007-11-07
Please protect me from cynical Internet security providing companies - where can I sign up?
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David 2007-10-12
Wow. Someone hit the Kickapoo Joy Juice a little harder than usual this morning!
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rmogull 2007-10-12
It's just one of those Fridays- ooh… look… Starbucks!
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Aline Kaplan 2007-10-12
Rich: I read your bio. "Rich Mogull, Founder, CEO, Jedi, and part-time neurosurgeon." Does this mean you'‘re related to Buckaroo Banzai? Aline
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rmogull 2007-10-12
That jerk? He's always stealing my thunder. Just because he can play a guitar doesn'‘t make him any better at particle physics than me.
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Mike 2007-10-12
I suppose anyone can claim anything but, "world's leading provider of security consulting services". I find it hard to imagine that one guy fits that category. ;) I guess that's what ya get when you write your own copy.
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Anton Chuvakin 2007-10-11
Loved that! :-) Esp the scaring the grandma part :-)